Author: Manny OG
Handling Danger: The Mental Map.
These four groups are at the extremes in styles – and the average person is rarely at one extreme or the other and will sometimes even switch maps, depending on their state of mind at the time. But in general, this will help you recognize how your personality leans and your own specific strengths and weaknesses.
So let’s cover four extremes on how people deal with confrontation so you can begin an honest evaluation of yourself. They are: 1) the Reasoner… 2) the Survivor… 3) the Dominator and… 4) the Virtuous Protector.
Let’s take a look at each one.
1. The Reasoner: A person using the “Reasoner Mental Map” tries to negotiate his way out of trouble. His motto is “can’t we all just get along?”.
The Reasoner believes that all people are essentially good and rational – meaning that they think it’s possible to resolve any conflict by simply tapping into their opponent’s “better angels”. He believes that if he’s simply nice to other people, they will be nice to him – because (he believes) nobody really wants conflict. Yes indeed, he’s a “reasonable” person living in a world of “reasonable” people.
This is the most dangerous of mental maps. Why? Because the outlook truly does not reflect reality. Everyone is NOT your friend.
Think about it this way – just how far would this, “Reasoner,” mental map work in, would say… prison. Be as reasonable as you want – but I’m pretty sure you’re in for a very special ending.
However, the “Reasoner” can be a good way to avoid trouble against equally reasonable folks — but will NOT work against the tens of thousands of dangerous psychopaths walking today’s streets.
2. The Survivor: This mental map is a total commitment toward “self-preservation”. The motto is “don’t tread on me – but go ahead and tread on him”. A person running on this particular mental map software has a more realistic version of the world and understands that everyone is not his friend… that some people may just hurt him for the “thrill” of it.
Okay… this has advantages because at least the Survivor will do whatever it takes to survive – as an individual he’s willing to lie, cheat, and if necessary, fight his way out of a confrontation. So, yes…he’s better equipped to realistically deal with confrontation than the “Reasoner” mental map.
But he’s a lone wolf. He believes he’s responsible for just one person – himself — which means you should forget about depending on him for backup. You’ll be “thrown to the wolves” as fast as he can run for cover. I am sure this is where the bystander syndrome comes from.
Unfortunately, our modern media and even law enforcement have reinforced this Survivor “stay out of it” mindset.
We’ve all heard it… “don’t get involved”… “call the police”… or “just bend over and let him do whatever he wants”.
It’s an attitude that has permeated our culture – and has resulted in able-bodied men standing by and watching while innocent people are attacked.
3. The Dominator: This guy looks upon himself as the “universal police”. His motto is “don’t disrespect me or my friends”. He is often a self-absorbed person who is very sensitive to disrespect and will act on any slight — real or imagined.
People fear him for the simple reason that he’ll fight at the drop of a hat.
The Dominator is not necessarily a bully or a disruptive rowdy (although he can be) — he does understand right from wrong — but he’s ego-driven and will definitely “back up” his friends, rarely allowing thugs and bullies to take advantage of him or loved ones.
On the other hand, the Dominator is somehow always in continual conflict with others – often far too involved in other people’s business — which puts him in a position to be imprisoned, permanently injured, or killed.
Dominators who do not change their ways rarely make it to old age.
4. The Virtuous Protector: Okay… this may sound a bit “corny” – like a knight in shining armor is about to ride up on a white stallion. This is (in my humble opinion) the highest form of mental maps. His motto is “be the silent man with a big stick”.
Many experienced street fighters (who survive) eventually advance from a bully to some form of a Virtuous Protector. A person in this mental map knows the real dangers of fighting, so he deeply understands what’s important to fight for — and especially what’s not. He’s not overly concerned about slights or insults and is much more rational in dealing with confrontation.
He knows from experience that any fight can end in jail, serious injury or death, but, on the other hand, he doesn’t hesitate when a situation requires action. He WILL help others when he’s truly needed. He has a strong sense of right and wrong and will not brag about his fighting abilities or push people around.
As humans, it’s in our nature to be emotional and — unless you’re an android – your emotions are NOT directly under your control. But, your actions are.
The virtuous protector focuses on managing his behavior – not managing his emotions.
In conclusion, these four groups are “artificial constructs”, meant to help guide you in your own self-discovery process. These are NOT psychological profiles meant to define a personality because, like we said, one man may use all four of these mental maps at different times. So clearly the mental map is more useful as a general “gauge” of future behavior. As you progress in your fighting abilities, you’ll hopefully also progress toward a more virtuous person who uses his skills wisely and justly.
All these information on how to develop your mind can be found on our Warrior Mind Combat modules and other training packages.